True Will

This is a very deep philosophical concept brought to light from the depths of Thelema practices by Aleister Crowely (It must be noted here that there is debate as to whether or not Thelema existed prior to Crowley, though that’s another discussion, for another time).

Diary of a Drug Fiend by Aleister Crowley Click the Image to go to Amazon

This is a running theme in his writing. On a personal note, I first came across it and truly got the grasph and understanding of True Will in his fictional book, Diary of a Drug Fiend, about a couple in the 1920’s that get hooked on cocaine and heroin and are aided in being released from their addiction by a Crowley-esque figure through spiritual practices.

It is there that the True Will was very well explored, and I gained a very full understanding of it through my own personal meditations following.

The True Will is an understanding of the self in such a way that you know the soul purpose and calling in this life. When you take away everything else, it is the one thing you know that can get you through anything. For some it is Magickal Practice, for some it is an art, parenting, loving _____, physical activity, writing, meditation, building, and so on.

It is more than a passion. It is a driving Will. It will be a common thread that has pulled you along, lingered in the back of your mind if not resting quite happily on the forward of your mind. Once realized, you’ll feel silly for not have seeing it sooner. How could it have been ignored? Or perhaps, you’re one of the lucky ones that has always known it, and have been able to build your life around it.

To try to ignore the True Will is to ignore a part of the self. I personally equate it, in this evolving modern world of ours, as ignoring one’s sexuality. It keeps you caged in, keeps you separated from that which helps contribute to who you are, and as long as that barrier is up, you can never achieve completion in this life, wholeness.

A personal story: When I learned about this, I fully believed that my True Will was to practice Magick, and practice natural medicine. I had a love of plants and the nature around me, and how everything was connected. I wrote about it daily, read about it every chance I got, and was enrolled in a long distance learning program working towards my MA in Holistic Healing. Magick seemed to go hand in hand with it, and it was the only thing that made me feel centered and whole.

As time when on, my passion faded for natural medicine. I still believed in everything I had been striving towards, though the passion was just not there any more. I realized that wasn’t my True Will. I continued on with life and it wasn’t until February 2014, when I was laid off from my job, and knew I needed to do something, that I realized what I had been denying myself. Ever since I could pick up a writing utensil, I have written. Behind everything I did was the need to write. I journalled all the time, wrote about everything, wrote articles and essays no one would ever see, wrote novels and stories – and I was always at my worst when I wasn’t writing.

Writing has been my True Will. And thus, I make sure that it is the backbone of everything I do. I go to school to write, I have four blogs to write, I keep a personal journal, I write copious emails and letters – all to ensure that I am living my True Will. And while my world has crumbled around me in the past year, and I have had a very difficult year, I was never so dark and hurt within myself as I was when I wasn’t writing. Thus is my True Will.

What is your’s? What have you done to ensure you are living in alignment with your True Will?

**Jane is a student in Bellingham, Washington of Academics and a self-study pupil of magickal arts. She has spent time over a span of 15 years practicing meditation and attuning to the Universe, though her Will leads her along the path of the Written Word. You can read her other blog, Scribing English or her other articles on her Hubpages account, ThompsonPen 




Protection against and Recovery From Draining

I am able to take a lot on. I pride myself in being busy, and being able to handle a lot of differing things. However, every now and then, I buckle, and I need to recharge my batteries.

However, recently I found myself, without knowing it, pouring my energy out to other people (ok, one person I was directly meaning to do so). I neglected my ability to shield myself, and/or took for granted the strength I may or may not have had. As a result, I woke up one morning without any ability to think or move. My bones felt as though they had been replaced with cement, and my ability to string together a sentence was next to nothing.

I thankfully had friends that were ready to spring into action and help. One made me some bathsalts with rose buds and oil as well as her own white light energy charging it. Another put together a little rejuvenation kit for me at the shop she works at including incense, oils, mists, crystals and a string of lemongrass.

The latter friend with the crystals had me hold each crystal as I read about their properties. My energy was so drained that my fingers were twitching as I held each one because. It’s much like when putting hot water in cold glass and it cracks. That’s how I felt. Eventually the twitching stopped, and my hands stopped shaking as well.

This was an awful feeling, and I plan on doing whatever I can to prevent it from happening again. Three things I need to be mindful of:

  1. Recharging myself – this means taking time to meditate, sit with crystals, disconnect from electronics, etc. This is both on the spiritual plane as well as the physical plane. If I’m not nourishing myself, then I will have nothing to draw from to get me through the day mentally or physically. So eating right is important too. I recently have been living on a diet of chips and cup o’ noodle soups.
  2. Remembering when helping people not to draw on my own reserves. I have a little bit of reiki training, and even from what I’ve gathered outside of it, you can allow yourself to be a medium for Universal energy. When I am sending healing and loving energies, I need to remember to tap into Universal energies instead of my own.
  3. Shield myself. In part, I was allowing people to take my energy, whether I was aware of it or not. I used to constantly reaffirm my shield, though somewhere along the line I think I decided it was strong enough, and gradually stopped. As a result, I think my shield has been next to nothing, with only the silver and pentagram pendant I wear to help protect me. However, when considering protection, it’s not just from intentional, malice forces, but from those around you that you care about and open yourself up to consciously or unconsciously.

Let’s focus on preventatives – shielding and alternative sources of energy pools to draw from.

How do you shield yourself?
There many different ways to go about doing this. Some do it through meditation, some do it through pendants, some do it through regular practice of certain rituals.

  1. Meditation
    When you meditate you strengthen your aura, which also can act as protection. However, there is a meditation I generally like to do before I go to bed. I think I learned it from Modern Magick by Donald Michale Kraig – since it is very similar to the Relaxation Ritual he writes about, though slightly tweaked. But I have been doing this meditation for so long, I can’t remember where it came from.
    This works for strengthening your shield, connecting you with the earth and Universe and thus recharging you as well.
    You can do this sitting in a chair  or laying down. Try not to have any limbs crossed – so no crossed legs or feet, or hands.
    Visualize a sphere of white protective light above your head about at your crown chakra. Move it slowly down your body, so that it wraps you three dimensional blanket of white protective light. The sphere moves down your body, relaxing your muscles as it goes. If there is a part of you that remains tense or returns to a tense state, gently and methodically move the sphere to that area and work on relaxing it. Move the sphere back up your body so that it resumes it’s place at above your head. You are still surrounded by it’s white light.
    Imagine a string of silver or white come down from the Universe. This light is divine, and meets your sphere of light, strengthening its effect with Universal energy and love.
    While still visualizing the Universal Energy coming down, visualize that energy traveling through your chakras, feeding energy to each, all the way through your feet, then continuing down into the earth. It keeps traveling down until it gets to the earth’s core. You have created a channel between the earth and Universe. It is a two way street. Feel the energy of the earth traveling up this chanel and into you, meeting each of your chakras and feeding energy into each.
    Stay like this for as long as you want.
  2. Wearing certain stones, symbols and metals can help enforce your shield, such as silver, quartz, citrine, hematite and a pentagram. However, if you are wearing them, please remember to cleanse them regularly. This can be done by burying them in soil, in sea salt, putting them in a stream, or my favorite – putting them in the light of the sun or the full moon.
  3. White Sage, sandalwood and lemongrass are good incenses or essential oils to burn around you at some point of your day. If you have a bundle of white sage, after lighting, run it along yourself, under your arms, between your legs, under your feet (carefully, of course). The smoke will dispel any negativity and help charge you as well.
  4. Regularly practicing the Lesser Banishing Ritual of a Pentagram as well as the Middle Pillar Ritual will help keep you charged, if done correctly.

What do you do if you’ve made the mistake of draining yourself?

  1. Rest! Go home and rest! Don’t leave the house just rest!
  2. Turn off electronics. Electromagnetic Smog, defined in The Crystal Bible as “A subtle but detectable electromagnetic field that can have an adverse effect on sensitive people. The smog is given off by electrical power lines and items such as computers, cell phones and televisions,” can throw off your energy quite a bit, and drain you trying to fend it off, whether you’re aware that you’re doing it or not. Allowing yourself time without electronics is a good practice any way, but definitely should be done when drained.
  3. Drink lots of water! Again, if you can’t look after yourself physically, the rest of you will suffer too. Never say no to H2O!
  4. Bath with seasalt and rose (the benefits of Rose can be found here). Use candles if possible to light your bathroom, or if you have a window and it’s a fantastically full moon out, just let the light of the full moon stream in. Feel the energy of the rose, the candles, the water, the moon fill you. Drink it in (do not literally drink the bath water). If you can and feel comfortable, dunk your head back and submerge your face in the bath for a moment or two, being as encompassed by the energy of the bath as possible. Stay as long as you’re comfortable in the bath.
    When you’re ready to get out, drain the bath tub, but stay in it, feeling any negativity that might have been dwelling in you melt away down the drain with the water. Breathe in the energy of the elements around you, breathe out negativity.
    My experience with this – I literally saw my own aura brighten, something I have never experienced before. I have never seen auras, and this time I saw it all around me, and even my vision became blocked with my aura as it strengthened and filled me. I stayed in the bath tub after it had drained for several minutes, breathing in the pink and orange energies from the rose and candles (I collected the rose buds before I drained the bath and was holding them in my left hand, my receiving hand). I visualized white, orange and pink going in, and expelled black, which eventually faded to gray, which faded to nothing with each breath.
  5. Spend time with crystals. Again, quarts and citrine are great for rejuvenating energy. Some other crystals which are very beneficial are emerald, sugilite, and malachite. There are a great many more, but these are just a few to get you started.
    Because of this, it is a good idea to ensure that you regularly spend time with crystals any way, charging them when you can. In my case, it had literally been years since I brought them out of their little bag, and as a result, yielded little results for me.
  6. Black candles – these are good for rejuvenating energy as well. Though be sure that when you burn them your intentions are on filling yourself with positive energy. It might be beneficial as well to anoint the candle with rose, white sage, lemongrass or sandalwood oil as well.
  7. Meditate. See instructions above.

So please, don’t do what I did, or didn’t do as the case might be. Look after yourself, shield yourself, protect yourself, and replenish yourself. Just because you love the people you’re around and they love you doesn’t mean you’re safe from accidentally giving your energy away or having it sucked away from you. Both happen without intention, and it truly sucks when it does.

**Jane is a student in Bellingham, Washington of Academics and a self-study pupil of magickal arts. She has spent time over a span of 15 years practicing meditation and attuning to the Universe, though her Will leads her along the path of the Written Word. You can read her other blog, Scribing English or her other articles on her Hubpages account, ThompsonPen